Thursday, 11 September 2008

so much

so sweet
sweetest print i bought on etsy from littlest flower. i absolutely love it and the colour is so much nicer in real life...

so, so much to say. so many thank yous i need to express for advice and commiseration that has come my way from the last couple of posts. i know they say you get bombarded with advice as a new parent, and it's true, but i really welcome any and all tips that i can soak up. with your help and what i've gleaned from books and online, i'm happy to say that mae and i have come to a place where i'm actually feeling really confident about the path we're on and how our days (and nights) are going. yes, she still has scream crying bouts but not nearly as frequently and we're learning ways to either cope with them or cut them short. i have to admit, as i'm sure has been fairly apparent, that i've found the beginning of this new life very, very hard - there have been plenty of tears from me, especially when the sleep deprivation starts to take it's toll. but this week has been, overall, good. i can't say what has changed, really, because i think it's a lot of things. mae is growing and changing herself, adapting to things that previously caused huge crying bouts (although she's still none to keen on the bath...) and i've adapted as well, learning how to be the mother she needs and how to comfort her. getting the feeding right has been the first step and really the key to all the improvements since. i think the foremilk bothered her tummy, which made her cry, which meant she wouldn't sleep, which meant she got overtired and impossible to console... and it just became this endless cycle. plus everything was new to her so it was hard for her to find comfort in anything, including us. she is still slightly fussy during some feeds, mucking around and arching her back when the milk hits her tummy so i've decided to give up dairy for a week and see if this helps at all (i love dairy. this is HARD.) but, again, i think her wee digestive tract just might need a couple more weeks to work itself out. developmentally she is doing great, gaining heaps of weight, strong as a little ox, working on the smiles and coos and generally stealing my heart with her little faces.

if you thought that last one was good...

little clown

15 comments:

  1. Mae is looking gorgeous - good to hear she's settling into life.
    I work with little babies. If they don't like having a bath, we wrap them in something light, like a muslin wrap. Then they go into the bath, wrap and all. It helps them to feel much more secure. If the babe is happy, you can gently unwrap them a little. Otherwise, we just give them a good wipe over in all the grotty spots when we've got them back on the towel.
    You may have already heard/tried this - sounds like you've had lots of advice! Hope it all goes well :)

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  2. Oh my - she is gorgeous - I love those little faces, such curiosity. So much to see and learn.

    I am glad to hear you are hitting your stride. Those first weeks are real crunchers I think. I learnt fast why sleep deprivation was used as torture!!

    PS - I bought the same print from Littlest Flower for my sister!

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  3. mae is so cute!

    glad to hear that you are finding your way, I think 1st time round it took me a while to get my confidence up about the choices I was making, but I got there in the end!

    My daughter never liked the bath much either & I tried having one with her & sometimes even feeding her in there helped :-)

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  4. I gave up diary after my calm baby turned into a crying miserable little boy. It was very hard as I was consuming plenty of milk and yoghurt at that point. He settled after about two days and things got much, much better, so stick with it if you find it works.

    He is over three months old now and we have not encountered any more troubles after a problematic week or so.

    I was able to give him his oobee (lali le oobee cottontail) a couple of weeks ago when he started being able to hold toys. The softness and the long ears make it really easy for him to cuddle for short times.

    Wishing you well for the next few months. Wait till she starts smiling and gurgling. It's lovely your heart will melt even more.

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  5. Gorgeous baby. I'm glad to hear things are improving. Yay for you and Mae.

    One thing I found with both of mine was that just when I thought a difficult phase was about to smash me to smithereens, it ended. They do change so rapidly during the first year.

    Deep breaths, this too shall pass. The mantra of motherhood.

    (then next thing you know shell be turning 5 next month and starting school and the very thought of it will cause a nervous breakdown...oh no, that's not you, its me)

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  6. so glad to hear things are a little easier. Your little Mae is very sweet.

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  7. It can take 2-4 weeks to notice a change as it takes awhile for the milk to leave your breastmilk completely and then to leave her body. You may notice a difference sooner though.

    Mae is an absolute adorable little baby! I love those first sweet smiles. I'm glad things are settling down for you. Those first few months are so, so hard and I don't know that anyone really prepares us for it! It goes quick though when you look back.

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  8. Mae is beautiful! I'm so sorry to hear about the those tough first few weeks. My DS was the colicky baby from hell and was basically crying off and on for about 6 months; my husband actually had to take an extended medical leave from his job. His pediatrician told us that he was the most difficult baby in the practice. Turns out he had reflux, tongue-tied (hence the similar breastfeeding woes) and once his system matured, he became a different baby. Well, after he learned to sleep by himself actually. DD is a completely different baby and we didn't have any colic or reflux with her thank goodness. But of course we had the tough first few months of screaming due to over tiredness, etc.
    What has really helped with the crying is standing near the kitchen exhaust fan which helped calm her down to sleep and bouncing her on a exercise ball. It will get better soon, hang in there!

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  9. Susan3:07 am

    Your daughter is a cutie. You never know with babies. My first 2 were easy and my third seemed to nurse 24-7. It was the only thing that shut her up!

    My advice on the bath - one of you try taking a shower with her. It works better if one does the holding and the other does a quick shampoo and wash. My babies liked this better and it was much faster! Good luck.

    P.S. All brand new moms have a crying jag because the baby won't stop crying at least a few times. Even us old pros on our 3rd or 4th! Keep your chin up.

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  10. Anonymous4:28 am

    ahaha, the second picture looks very adorably funny

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  11. She is adorable! I love the big eyes! If you think that dairy might be the culprit, you might try giving it up for a couple of weeks - I hear it can take a long time to clear out from your system.

    Trust your intuition! You know your baby better than anyone else!

    Good luck!

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  12. Yeah! Go Leslie, go Mae! :-)

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  13. kirsten9:52 am

    good for you, leslie!
    it is an incredibly tough time. so much to learn and it can be overwhelming.
    and there really isn't a "right" way or a "wrong" way to do things - but what is right for you and your babe. i think that is what i found the hardest. thinking that i was doing it wrong and everyone else had it right.
    trust yourself and keep working on things to find what works for you and mae.
    and she is such a sweetie! xx

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  14. So glad to hear things are going well and you're finding your routine.....she is a little beauty!

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  15. Echoing the comments above - Mae is just beautiful. And those cheeks!!!

    You're doing the best you can Leslie. The first 6 months are definitely a roller coaster and as someone mentioned above - this too shall pass, in the blink of an eye!

    One thing I did notice about my two girls is that the eldest was a very fussy baby and cried a lot - as a 4 year old I have found her to be a very sensitive, compassionate and loving child. It bothered me when she an infant that she cried so much and we had a hard time with the lack of sleep, but sometimes I think that some of that fussiness and crying was part of her personality and temperament and the only way she could at the time, express it :-)

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